I don't really even know where to start with this post, it will be sporadic and complicated. I often find my way back to my blog when I am in this mood. I will start with, it's 8:15, I just hit start on the dishwasher and it hit me that I haven't stopped since I lifted my head off the pillow at 6:00am this morning. Work was an OK day, an improvement over Friday when, well we wont go there. I made it another day though! When I leave work I walk casually to my car but on the inside I am skipping clicking my heals together swallowed in sunshine. In the car to the bus stop I go.
I grabbed the girls off the bus only to struggle through Devan's homework. MATH, I remember math homework struggles as a kid. At some point during our struggles tonight I realized I must have been caught up in the fact that she should at least grasp the concept, because she had learned this at school. When I realized by doing the homework together she getting everything she needed out of her homework, practice. We worked through two sheets of homework together and she went from tears to happy. Next up they girls changed for cheer, snack in the car... BUT not before Devan told me her shoe broke the day before. They have bungee laces that you quickly pull to tighten and the bungee was in pieces. I at that point I wished Chris was there to help take some of the weight off my shoulders. This is not a feeling I am familiar with. I have never been the mom to not be able to handle it all on my own. Due to Chris's schedule when the girls were babies, I was on my own more often than not. I had a routine, a schedule and it worked well for me. It has carried into the girls school years, Chris and I share the work but rarely at the same time. Last night I ended up staying at work late and got home at 6:45 so our one night as a family was a flop. I found out about being expected to stay after it was already time for me to go. This could have been disastrous if Chris were on night shifts. I relieve him so he can relieve someone who has worked a 12 hour day shift. I was a little fired up to say the least. At home tonight I could have used the company, extra set of hands and someone to talk to. After I dropped the ladies off at school I made a run to Walmart for shoes. I bought two pairs for $24.00 :) I was really excited! The pair that broke the day before were from LL Bean and were not cheap. I fueled up and went through the car wash. SERIOUSLY the highlight of my night. I put my car in neutral and sat relaxed as I watched the machines go to work scrubbing my ridiculously dirty car. I contemplated going through over and over but that would have added up ;) NEXT is a moment I am not proud of.... I went through the McDonald's drive thru and ordered a mess of chicken nuggets and a fry, YES I have seen the video of how chicken nuggets are made and honestly I don't care tonight. We eat McDonald's once in a blue moon. I picked the girls up at school at 6:30 and was home by 7:00, by this time Chris was home as well, we did the best we could to squeeze in family time before sending the girls off to bed. I picked up around the house, loaded the dishwasher and plopped down to vent. At this point I have no clue if what I just wrote it worth the time to read, but I do know I feel better. My day was busy, it was crazy at times but it was for people I would give anything to make happy, for them to know I have their backs no matter what. Tomorrow is a new day.
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